Genesis 27 - I Jacob

Just as it was tempting to judge Esau, it is equally tempting to cast an eye of anger toward Jacob. What a dysfunctional family we see on display. In chapter 27, Jacob tricks his father out of the blessing he intended to give Esau. He lies and cheats until he gets what he wants.

How does he pretend to be his brother? Primarily by dressing up as him in skins that mimic Esau's hairy arms. I want to judge Jacob, I do, but I've done the same thing in my own life.

Sometimes when faced with a challenge, I will wear a mask instead of doing the work of actually becoming what I want to be. The best example of this is perhaps the first few years of my marriage. My wife and I never had a disagreement for the first five years we are married. Before you clap at our ability to get along, let me say this was not a product of us doing well. It was a product of us being fake.

Two, strong, alive inside, people are bound to disagree. That is OK. That is healthy and honest and real. But we both thought that being a good Christian couple meant never arguing. So instead of investing in the hard work of being intimate and real with our feelings, we put on the mask of "happiness." We concealed our hopes and dreams in order to steal from each other the concept of a "good marriage."

It didn't work. The real stuff just festered. It just boiled over inside because no matter how many "good husband" masks I wore, I was the same unchanged person. And just like Jacob had to flee when his deception was revealed, we emotionally fled each other and our relationship suffered.

Things are different now. We don't wear masks or animal skins like Jacob. We argue. We disagree. We engage about the things we really care about. Is our marriage perfect? Not by a long shot, but it is real. And that's something I am really happy about.